Giving Unsolicited Advice or Help
Often wondered why advice and assistance is seldom appreciated?
It is the nature of things that everything flows from a higher level to a lower level, from surplus to a deficit.
People rarely seek advice or assistance, because almost every individual thinks that he or she is the cleverest person in the world. Who knows? They might even be.
'So if I am cleverer than you, I really do not want or need your advice. However I will tolerate your insolence because you are my parent, boss, customer, teacher, spouse, partner, financier etc.' They hear but they do not listen and hence do not absorb the advice.
Experience is a harsh teacher, but its beauty is it drains us of our bloated egos and cleverness. This in turn compels us to open our minds to become receptive to other ideas and even assistance and we even actively solicit it.
When people become thirsty they will ask for and gratefully accept and consume whatever will quench their thirst. Similarly until a person realises that he or she needs help any assistance or advice given to them will be counter productive and almost never appreciated.
Does this mean we should not offer advice or help?
We often emerge angry and unhappy after assisting and advising others.
Our unhappiness stems from our unfulfilled expectations. It has become customary
or inevitable that we have expectations of reward or appreciation for our advice or help.
There is an old Indian philosophy, "Do good and throw expectations into the well" meaning, 'do good but expect nothing in return'.
I always try and assist wherever its possible for me to making this world a better place. I have matured to understand that the force that guides me to assist others is the same force that guides others to help and advise me. So I have no expectations of reward nor appreciation.
No expectations means no unhappiness.
Do things without expectation and reward, and let the 'Law of Karma' do its magic.